++ curr_year ;

This is an oft repeated kind of statement used whilst programming. In this case what it signifies is that a few hours more and the statement would get executed all over the place and will then let us know that 2006 has come. People will start yelling out "Happy New Year" to all and sundry. People will have more drinks. People would prefer to get drunk to their gills. People would create a commotion in the middle of the night and would burst crackers, as if something is really remarkable in knowing that it is now 2006. And in the process, while driving theyd crash somewhere and a few innocent lives would be lost. Steve Harris and Bruce Dickenson indeed got it right when they proclaimed that there is "No Prayer for the Dying".

A friend has just informed me that incase one decides to go ahead and get drunk on New Years Eve at some bar or something, then its better to carry a "drinking permit" along. Else, ask the bar owner to issue a temporary one-day drinking permit that costs five bucks. It can be issued on the spot. It would probably save you from an awkward situation if a drunken posse of policemen barge in and demand to know why you are drinking. If you are certain that the cop is drunk then probably you can show your school ID-card to him and tell him its your drinking permit and then hed let you go. Or if he is really drunk then he's stop by at your table for a couple of drinks. And since youd be drinking with a cop, the bar guy woudnt dare bill you. So you can then go ahead and gulp down as many more as you want.

Irrespective of what you do, I think ill do what everyone else does on New Years Eve and thats wish you. So here's my :

Wish you all a very Happy New Year 2006

Murder at IISc

Alt. title : Forthcoming events casting their shadow
(You may want to read the epic - King Arthur by Alfred Lord Tennyson, for the origins and understanding of this classic phrase.)

Terror has now struck the elite. Its no wonder that the proponents of terror now feel that if they attack the educated elite and the economic drivers of India, then their actions can have more impact than blowing up a crowd of fifty commoners out in the streets of a city.

Its rather sad that an IIT Delhi professor lost his life in the shootout at IISc on 28 Dec 2005. Also injured were a couple of more delegates at the conference at IISc, Bangalore. The delegates were proceeding to have dinner (or were having dinner) when the attacker struck.

One would have least expected that a peaceful place of education and research would be a venue for a terrorist attack. Likewise, security systems at such places are not so stringent about security. Back in Bombay, the immediate beefing up of security at the ongoing Mood Indigo festival (26 Dec to 29 Dec) , was a fallout of this attack.

Reports have come in that it had been somewhat anticipated that terror is likely to strike the technology centers (the current money spinners) of India. Bangalore is such a place. It has also been reported in todays papers that theres been an anonymous fax to the Karnataka CM's office that there would be attacks today at his residence and also at a prominent hotel - perhaps to target the New Year party goers.

Similarly, at the Indian Institute of Technology Kanpur , the three-day silver jubilee alumni meet of the Class of 1981 began today amidst unprecedented security arrangements. Clearly, the authorities were taking no chances after Wednesday’s attack at IISc.

It also been decided to step up security at IIT Guwahati, ahead of an international science conference next week following the terror attack in Bangalore. IIT Guwahati is hosting the "Heat and Mass Transfer Conference 2006", where some 500 scientists from all over the world are expected to participate.

Well, whats happened has happened and it is a rather sad event that marks the end of 2005. Having said that, I must also add that the old adage of "... forthcoming events casting their shadow ... " is somewhat true. I had mentioned in my post of 28 December afternoon (i.e. before the attack later that evening) , that the frisking being done at the Mood Indigo festival at IITB was probably uncalled for, since why would one want to blow up IITB. Im no clairvoyant, but then the old agade somehow holds.

This event has sure created fear at all research and educational places like the IITs and IIMs. May the soul of the departed professor, rest in peace.

Freedom

Freedom consists not in doing what we like, but in having the right to do what we ought

Pope John Paul II

Santoor and guitar at OAT, IITB

Its "Mood Indigo" time at IIT Bombay. The most popular youth and collegiate festivals in all of India. Companies falling over each other to sponsor events at the festival (apparent from the hundereds of banners and posters that littered the green surroundings). They have many events at MI and one of them is the "Confluence Nite" - at which some top rated performers of classical music are invited to perform. This time it was Shiv Kumar Sharma (Santoor) and Vishwa Mohan Bhatt (Mohan Veena - acutally a modified guitar). The concert was at the OAT - Open Air Theatre at IIT Bombay.

I went with a friend, who is currently a student at IITB and hence he was able to get a pass for me. The pass said 6.30 pm and we were in the already-long-by-then queue by 6 pm. And as always by the time the first notes of the santoor were struck, it was already 7.30 pm. But not before frisking and all - probably they think people would want to blow up IITB and the kids in there. The pass said that theyd thouroughly frisk the ladies and their purses too - perhaps to let the kids of IITB have some first time lessons in womens handbags and their contents.

SKS

Ok, Shiv Kumar Sharma is a top notch player. As he announced - he's been playing for the IIT kids for the last 25 years - and how happy and all he is to be invited again and again (perhaps the MI guys pay him well for this 100-string knockfest). He also told some crappy story about how some kids in "America" came upto him after a concert in the US, and told him theyd heard him play at MI over 24 years ago. Long live America - thats the motto of IITB anyway.

He does play well. Infact his name is synonymous with the santoor. He played two peices - the first one being "Rag Yaman". The second one - I forget the name - but it was more for the live-uneducated-in-music-type-of-audience - since it was full of top speed riffs on his santoor and the speed play by the pakhawaj player ( Bhawani Shankar) and the tabla player (Viyay Ghate - who is indeed good) and all sorts of histrionics. It got them the desired applause from the kids and profs. What one also did notice was that everytime the kids went up in a roar of applause (perhaps after a speed demo or a subtle tring-tring) - theyd focus the bright flood lights on the crowds - so that perhaps old SKS and party can have a good look at the clappers.

SKS has this huge mop of stylish hair and this adds to his "brand value". Both the percussionists too sported long hair - all for the desired glamour flashes - jerking their heads and all while belting out 100km/hr beats on their drums. This feature and get-up is observed in almost all male classical performers. So that perhaps if they dont play too well, their get-up can compensate for their presence.

VMB

Vishwa Mohan Bhatt - of The Mohan Veena fame - was next. Only that he was along with a flute player - some Ronu someone. This Ronu guy seemed to be rather good at stealing the show from old VMB. He started off with one of his own "compostions". Actually what they were playing was "fusion" or "world music" as its called these days. This kind of music keeps a classical base but leaves out the "boring technicalites" of classical style and replaces that with the show-gimmicks of popular and rock-and-roll kind of music. Hence Fusion.

My personal take on this is that this music is rather a form of "fission" - netither here nor there - for it takes apart both the classical part as well as the rock part. But then if kids are willing to pay up and buy their music and attend their shows, then why blame Ronu and VMB. This is a business too.

Anyway VMB did play a few songs - named unimaginatively like "Song of love" or "Everlasting Love" or "Encounter" etc. - nothing related to the song perhaps. Maybe I'm being too critical of this type of musical fare, having not heard much of this myself. So in a way ive probably no right to comment on this. But still .....

VMB also played his Grammy winning peice - I forget the name. It was allright - but I really dont know what the Grammy boys were doing when they decided to give old VMB the award. Perhaps the other nominees that year were just banging plates and spoons.

Anway VMB pulled a big one when he said that IITB's MI was the answer to the "Woodstock" festival. Lets not get into this pointless debate but I must add a point of triviality. The IIT kids were frisking you like anything for cigarettes and "narcotics - as their pass said" . And whoever has any idea of "Woodstock" knows what happened there in the sixties. So much so for comparisions.

VMB also was almighty pleased that he was at MI again. (The green bucks speak for themselves). He also let out the trio war-cry leading with a "hip-hip" ... and "hooray" yelled out the kids and profs. After all he had just proclaimed that MI was the answer to Woodstock.

I thought VMB could be better. He's good at his instrument and it would be worthwhile if he plays more in the Indian style rather than leaning on foriegn names and personalities. A little good would be done if he leaves behind the "fusion" or "fission" style for sometime.

All in all, a good show.

(It was free !!!! ) The kids had written on their pass that the pass cannot be sold.

Mahim Urs

I visited this place on the penultimate day of the "Mahim Urs" . It was the evening of 24 December, when myself and a friend went there. This is at the Dargah Sharif at Mahim. Its just about 10 mins walk from Mahim station. The complete name of the place / saint is "Darul-Uloom Hazrat Makhdoom Faquih Ali Mahimi". Now legend goes that this person was a kind of saint who lived eons ago at this place called Mahim. Hence the Mahimi appendage to the name. Im not sure if Mahim is named after him or vice-versa. People throng this place, especially during the "Urs" and ask for blessings and wishes. And just like the feast of Mount Mary at Bandra and at the St. Michaels Church at Mahim, people of all communities come here to be blessed and to ask for wishes.

What struck immediately was the orderly fashion in which the crowds conducted themselves. No hint of tensions and communal strife anywhere. It was rather crowded but later on I was told that the crowds that day were nothing compared to what it would be on the last day, i.e. Sunday. Also to be noted was the large police presence. Infact, if one is to beleive folklore, then its said that ages ago the police were helped by an old man in the area in order to nab some smugglers. Later on it was said that the "old man" was Makhdoom Baba himself. The police station close by , ever since has strong affilication to this place. Infact during the "Urs" the police are the first ones to place the "chaadar" inside the dargah. The police station also houses some old relics of the baba - all of which is safely tucked away in a cupboard at the police station. The police station iteslf is around 200 m away and at this time we saw that the festive lights and atmosphere was also to be seen at the police station.

Inside the dargah there were seperate entrances for males and females (many of whom were in a trance after perhaps some religious utterances of the in-charge inside). It was a rather solemn atmosphere and people did conduct themselves well.

And as is true of all religious fairs and places and events - the huge number of beggars - comprised mostly of young girls - is omnipresnet. They get after you to partake some cash - and narrate stories of hunger and misery. All this perhaps is part of an organised begging-network as every hardened Bombayite knows. One need not melt at their sight and stories. Outsiders would perhaps fall into the traps of these beggars.

Lined up outside teh dargah were a large number of stalls selling foodstuff, toys etc. and "chaadar sets" for the devotees who were going inside the dargah.

MRDPA

This is not another road and development authority like our MMRDA. This is a brand new Mithi River Development and Protection Authority. 26 July gave a lot of fame to this gutter (now fondly called a 'river') - and hence this fancy new authority.

The state has decided to clear the banks of the flood-prone Mithi River of all slums and other encroachments by 31 May 2006.The decision was taken at a secret meeting of the Empowered Committee of the MRDPA.

The thing to be noted is this empowered committe. That the committee has been christened with such a name, it suggests that there are several other commitees that dont have any power whatsoever. They'd probably call them Powerless Committees of the MRDPA. Another thing to be noted is the 'secret meeting' that took place. Some big spy-vs-spy detective game going on, perhaps. Must be a lot of fun.

Source

Sachin Tendulkar

Alt. Title : It's supposed to be a team game

I agree the kid plays well. He's 32 or 33 or something. He's made a lot of runs , I guess over ten thousand and has also scored 35 centuries. He's also played the maximum number of games, probably more than anybody else. He's earned billions. Every aspect of his life, both on the field and off it has been documented. People worship him (I still dont know if theres a place of worship in his name anywhere yet).

His hard core fans (many crores of them) have all claimed that the kid would hammer out 50 centuries or 75 and some over enthusisatic die-hard fans even have said he'd hit 100 centuries. (Bradman did hit those many in first class cricket. But then he was the Don.)

But .. keep in mind that the machine is getting old by the day. Earlier it used to be the back that gave problems, later on we heard something called the "tennis elbow" was giving problems. (Shouldnt the guy be playing cricket, instead of tennis, especially since "state" money is being pumped into the machine). He's also been in and out due to these "injuries". Injuries by the way are a part and parcel of any physically demanding sport - no one can escape the injuries, except the selection board people.

So how many more "tons" will Sachin score ? My over-optimistic and realistic guess is that his total tally of test cricket centuries wont go beyond 40. (Unless our BCCI decides that we play only against Bangladesh and Zimbabwe for the next 5 years).

I havent said or written that he's a bad player. He is indeed a good cricketer.

Forty.

By the way how many matches did India lose when Sachin scored centuries ? Or how many matches did we win when he didnt score the centuries ? Or for that matter any other player. Cricket is a team game and the team should always come first. In earlier years we'd heard that old Kapil Dev was given more overs to bowl so that he could get his record of taking maximum wickets and later on too Anil Kumble was given the chance of taking "10 wickets" against some team. In the process some players "dropped" catches off the bowling of someone else, just so that old Anil could bag them later on and complete his record. If records come along the way then its fine but dont get onto the field just to play for them.

(This post will be offensive to most persons.)

NRM on education

I was reading an article by Infosys Technologies chairman and chief mentor N R Narayana Murthy, in which he has said about freeing higher education and making it accessible to all. He's given suggestions of tripling capacity of the IIT's etc. Usually one hears people refererring to doubling of capacity - but perhaps in order to differentiate, NRM used the word "tripling". It was good, though none of the suggestions were extraordinary. The suggestions become extraordinary when NRM says so, not when you or me do so. (Unless the "you" is NRM himself, and if so, im privileged that NRM read this - "Hello Sir, How are you ?")

Allright, this apart, there was something that didnt go down well. And this was when he's mentioned that all the hot shot's join the software industry and the laggards go elsewhere to the other general industries. Now considers this - of the biggest hotshots that we have (lets for the moment assume that these kinds are the AIR-1 rankers or the 9+ CPI ones at the end of the IIT graduation) , how many join an IT company or go into software ? Youd find that most get into higher research and probably in diverse areas such as Physics and Mathematics - but not IT and software. Yes, many do go into Computer Science, but then thats different from what the IT and software industry does. How many Dijkstra's or Knuth's or Feynman's has India produced ? Ans : ZERO. What we excel in is, IT and software - and thats the part that comes into play after its decided whats to be done - we just go around doing whats to be done - we dont figure out in original terms as to whats to be done or how its to be done. This part is handled by the Dijkstra's or Knuth's or Feynman's.

If NRM thinks that all the hot shots get into software and the laggards do other things, then he is mistaken. You do fine hoards of IITians who study civil and metallurgical engineering (the so called laggards of the IITs) and then do software jobs.

We are not even considering the biggest drain that results from the IIT system - kids learn here (lakhs being spent on spoonfeeding them) and then go on to serve other nationalities. India thus becomes a labour supplier, that only benefits the kids, their families, and the administration who came up with these policies in the first place. To some extent, NRM has realised this when he says that higher education should not be subsidised and that higher education should be freed form the shackles of the state.

Perhaps, NRM wants all the hot shot kids to join his industry. The better the kids, the better the output. The better the output, the more the profits, and subsequently more sops and grants and favours from the government. After all who wouldnt want to hire or want the very best of whats available ? However, in order to sound appreciative and considerate of other "general industries" he's gone on to mention that the hot shots should look at jobs in the general industry too. This too works in the favor of the IT and software boys - for essentially IT and software are "services" to other main and more important "nation building industries". If tomorrow, everyone starts coding and crunching superficial excel sheets, then who will build the nation ?

BEST and "Straight Lines"

Alt. Title : BEST's penchant for "Straight Lines" and Right Angles

If one observes all of what comprises the BEST then one would probably come to this conclusion. Now this concept or idea thats being written about is rather hard to describe since its a pretty much of a mind abstraction activity, so perhaps readers might not know whats going on in this post.

Observe the BEST and you see right angles , 90 degrees and Straight Lines all over the place. Be it the buses or depots or buildings or breakdown trucks or reconnaissance vehicles. In a way this geometric similarity and the move towards simplicity is to be appreciated. Perhaps this stems from the old British hangover which this fine organisation has. The present day management (though ineffecient on practical fronts) has done well to keep this tradition, if we may call it. Who knows perhaps the future generations of its management might go the Volvo way - (which is perhaps the opposite of the "Straight Line" concept or theory).

Well at least something that the BEST has done well.

The new MH-01 LA 5[0-9][0-9][0-9] series

BEST has got itself a new batch of buses from Leyland (their preffered supplier). These most likely have found homes at the Deonar and Ghatkopar depots. Their outer look is quite similar to the older buses, except that the grey band that ran through the bus in the center has been replaced by a white band. The bus says its a part of the MUTP and it proclaims itself to be Bharat-III compliant. (Bharat-III being an unimaginitive alternate name for the Euro-III emission standard. Perhaps the locals didnt like it being called Euro. Or since we are in Bombay or Mumbai - perhaps the locals would have preffered Maharashtra-III or Shivaji-III. I should get an award for this fantastic suggestion.)

Coming back to the buses. Some points to be noted :

• The suspension of the buses is indeed good. Not that of a truck. I wouldnt say its like the Volvo's, but its far far better than what weve been subjected to earlier.
• The pickup is excellent. This perhaps is the reason why Ive already seen two of these buses involved in collisions - perhaps the power steering and pick up havent sunk in well with the drivers (who are anyway good-for-nothing - they should have stuck to driving tempos and lorries and bullock carts).
• The interiors have two extra rows of seats. That means 4 more standees can sit now. But this is at the cost of reduced space in the front exit areas. But this is also good since the BEST staffers cant now just get in and stand next to the exit door, blocking the whole crowd all the time.
• The bus pulls along smoothly and doesnt look as if its taking a lot of undue effort in doing so. Perhaps the diesel engines inside are more powerful. And its pretty silent for a bus. I would say on the highways the bus almost 'cruises'.
• The bus has a mirror above the entrance door. I dont know for what. Perhaps to allow the conductor and other sex starved passengers to have a wide angle look at the girls inside. Of late however these mirrors have been removed. Thats good.
• The bus has a rear display of the bus route number. Probably to let the 'late lateefs' know which bus they are running after. This is however not needed - since one can usually make out the bus route number (if one has travelled extensively on BEST buses before and has kept ones eyes open while doing so in the past) by looking at the 'depot code' (e.g. D, G, SN, BB, V, DH, MLV, OSH etc. ) of the bus thats painted on the rear.
• The windows have a additional sliding latch that helps to keep the windows halfway closed. But I doubt anybody would avail of this feature. As it is its problematic to get the windows opened or closed in the first place and expecting the latch to align with the hole in the window frame is I guess asking for too much from the BEST.

By and large a good bus. But it now all depends if the maintenance staff can keep them in good condition (thats a tall order indeed) - else they too would rust in peace in a few months.

Changed identities

Ive stayed here all my life. I still stay here at the same place. But now suddenly I dont know where I live.

Several cities in Karnataka have undergone changes in their names. Some are:

Bangalore-Bengaluru
Belgaum-Belagaavi
Mysore-Mysooru
Mangalore-Mangalooru
Hubli-Huballi
Bijapur-Vijapura
Gulbarga-Kalburgi

Theyve claimed that the current names were imposed by the British and the ones they are changing them to, are infact the original names. For example, its been said that Gulbarga is anyway known as Kalburgi and Mysore is always called Mysooru in Kannada. The name change of Belgaum has however not gone down well with the Maharashtrians. Now Belgaum is on the border of the two states and inside Karnataka. There has been a long tussle between the two states over who it belongs to. One side says that since the majority of the populace of Belgaum is Marathi speaking, hence it should belong to Maharashtra. The other side makes its own similar claims. The battle howver rages on. The new name Belagaavi does away with the 'gaum' or 'gaon' - its pronounced as Belgao - so this is a deviation from the Marathi sounding name. Hence the protests. Anyway since its legally part of Karnataka, the Maharashtra government can do little in this regard.

The name changes get effected from Nov 2006. So till then its Mysore and not Mysooroo or Mysooru or anything else - perhaps Maheshasooroo would have been better choice.

Other cities have undergone name changes in the past too. Some of them being - Bombay, Calcutta, Madras. Delhi and Hyderabad have been spared till now. Not for long I guess. Delhi would become either Dilli or Dehelvi or Dilly or something equally silly.

By the way one of our two rivers has said he's off to Belgaum. But infact he would be spotted at Changi Airport.

Dangerous boxes

Any ride on a BEST bus is dangerous. Now we are not commenting on the poor driving skills of the good-for-nothing BEST drivers. We are discussing the old run down metal boxes that the conductors (called "Master" by passengers and staff) use to store tickets. A close look at them and youll find that most are twsited and worn out. The sharp metal edges would be a sure shot tool to draw blood when the bus is packed and the conductor moves around. It is inevetible that this box would be touching you and the sharp broken metal edges of this box could injure you rather badly. Throw in the fact that every tenth passenger has infected blood and hence the consequences of a small cut from these boxes are horrendous.

Its time that the BEST pitched all of these rusted steel jobs and replaced them with more convenient, light and un-harmful fibre-graphite-carbon boxes. At least for the safety of the passengers.

Cricketier G

Some of you might have visisted the area around Portugese Church - Gokhale Road - and might have seen a bylane there by the name of Cricketier Vijay ... someone. This is indeed a relevation for we didnt know that those who play this game are not cricketers but are cricketiers. Anyway this small aside, gives us the title for this post.

We all know why Cricketier G has been dropped from the Indian cricket test team. Its simple. The requisite material didnt reach upstairs. When everything in the world revolves around money and sex, then how can a puny old game like cricket and its cricketiers be left out. Many feel its a matter of camps changing - the Marathas coming in place of the Bongs and thereby flushing out the other camps' players. Now one would wonder why ABC managed to stay in the team for so long. Perhaps he was keeping people happy. This is feasable to some extent for all of us know that the ABC stays in a small flat (all flats are always supposed to be small, even if they have 36 bedrooms) and not a bungalow (all bungalows are always supposed to be big, even if there is only place for the watchmans cabin). Sometime ago we had heard that ABC's wife had been spotted as she huffed and puffed her way up to the x'th story of her building (since the lifts were not working). Now one wonders that why would the wife of such a great celebrity cricketier, wash her own clothes in her own sweat, when probably the guy has enough money to rent a helicopter to fly her up to her flat when there the lifts are out of order. The reason perhaps is simple. Perhaps ABC doesnt have enough to rent the helicopter. So where did the money go ? Where did it go ? Where ... ?

Ans. : (This paragraph has come full circle).

Cricket administration and selection is a lethal and lucrative business. Dont sweat it out in the hot sun, trying to make it to the Indian team. Instead, get yourself into the selection commitees. Money will just pour in while you see the sweat pour from the cricketiers wives.

By the way we were supposed to be talking about Cricketier G. Anyway he's now gone. The selectors have found new sheep. Perhaps if G plays in some games too, it wont make much of a difference. Anyway when the thunderbolts from the Australians and Pakistanis come raining down on our boys - we know the result, irrespective if Cricketier G is in the team or not.

The media does indeed entertain us always. What would we do without them.

I have nothing against ABC and others. This post is meant to highlight the fact that money rules in all quarters of life - be it a game. The fact that a game and some of its proponents were mentioned, is just incidental. The helicopter story is just a media fairytale. Thats what they do best - spin tales. And the public does what it knows best - lap up these tales.

Not a WGSCNY, but a WDM-1

Now many will wonder whats a WGSCNY and a WDM-1. The former is a vestibuled self-generating second-class 3-tier sleeper coach and the latter is an older version of the WDM class of diesel locomotive. Now this picture shows the rear of this WDM-1 and it does look like the vestibued end of a regular passenger coach. Probably at stations, some unsuspecting people might want to board the engine iteslf, while looking for seats in the train. The WDM-1 is now removed from service and can be seen only at the National Rail Museum, Delhi. (Thats also where this picture has been taken). These days, however, the WDM-2 class are the most preferred locos on non-electrified routes.

While you are looking at this post, Id suggest you click the picture for a bigger view. You'll notice that the side guard rods (which are usually placed next to doors) are at a place where there doesnt seem to be any inlet or door. (There is a climbing ladder, though beneath it). Nor is it leading up to the top of the loco - its not a ladder also. So for what are these things for ? Just for fun perhaps - or for villagers to hang on to the loco for a short free ride till the next halt.

An idea in 200 words

The following letter was written by Eric Hoffer on the importance of being precise:

Wordiness is a sickness of American writing. Too many word dilute and blur ideas. An average American book is twice as long as a British book on the same subject. The same is true of articles. (Compare commentary with encounter).

There is not an idea that cannot be expressed in 200 words. But the writer must know precisely what he wants to say. If you have nothing to say and want badly to say it, then all the words in all the dictionaries would not suffice.

Do not count a, of, the, and, etc. Averaging the number of words in a line is O.K.

Tsunami is here again

I'm in the midst of a tsunami right now. Its been raging (or rather trickling since lunch) and has covered quite a bit of area. I only hope that it dosent reach the electrical equipment , for then we may be in for some unwanted "fireworks". Telephoning has not helped so far. Our evening visitor from the Kamlistan Studio is also very very happy that the tsunami struck. It couldnt have been a better evening. If it goes on for some more time, I guess ill have to visit the Star Trek studios, upstairs, for the important tasks.

Pay 6 rupees for a 8 rupees ticket

Well, this happened on the BEST (where else?). The other day I was travelling in the bus and as always there was a discrepancy in the fare known to the conductor and what it actually is supposed to be. Anyway we were pretty sure as to how much we are going to pay. Tucked inside our bags was the printout which would have been conclusive proof anyway. The conductor punched the 8 rupees ticket, thought over for a while over what we told him, and then took 6 rupees. Probably no scope for asking further questions.

I wonder how many other cases of this kind take place all day. It must be amounting to quite a decent sum. This would anyway go a long way in helping the BEST pay those hefty bonuses to its good-for-nothing staffers. Also theyve to pay several crores to the BMC or the MMRDA - for using the flyovers. Thats beside the point that only two routes out of 350 use the flyovers. I guess when the authorities decide to do things illogically, they do so with will, or as Mumbaikars would say "wholesale me".

MBA is not Management

This should be obvious.

MBA stands for Master of Business Adminstration. This means you are an expert in adminstering or conducting a business. So where does the "management" part come in ? Adminstering a business is like doing something thats told to you by somebody else - probably the lalaji or goon who runs your company. He's the leader and you are the servant. Management doesnt figure anywhere in this scheme of things. To become such a person go ahead and get yourself an MBA degree. These degrees are also distributed under different names such as PGDBA (by our fancy IIM's) - Post Graduate Diploma in Business Adminstration. Agreed, that the IIM thing is most valuable even if they call it anything else. (Whats in a name after all?). But the subtle difference being that its a diploma and that too in only adminstering a business.

The scope of an MBA thus is limited to only adminstering businesses. No Management.

Now lets get to what needs to be done if you want to be a Master of Management. Now for this go to IIT Bombay and pick up one. They give these Master of Management degrees. And this, mind you, is not business adminstration. However, if you are a master of management, then handling and adminstering a business should be childs play. Else if you dont get the IIT thing, then the next best thing is to get the Master of Management Studies (MMS) from the University of Bombay. Avoid the deemed places, unless its TISS - for then you get a MA in Personnel Management.

And after you are a master of management - you can "manage" things - anything, be it a WAG or a Bofors Gun. Not just finances and excel sheets. And as I said earlier adminstering a business would be childs play.

Move over Ravi Shankar (or The Double Shree)

For now we have this "Triple Shree"

We now have "Shree Shree Shree Pa. Pu. Shree Shivdutt Swamiji Maharaj". Yes, thats the full annotation of the name. Move aside Sri Sri Ravi Shankar (of the youga and Art of Living fame). I saw a poster of Triple Shree just this morning. Looks like he's just commenced operations and his publicty material has just reached the walls of bus stops. If you observe the promotional posters carefully, you see a rather simplistic and dull looking guy with a beard and all - a kind of ascetic look , perhaps to draw in crowds. These guys do have a rather fierce marketing group working for them - and this is essential when you have to differentiate yourself from the rest of the godmen who have already got respectable market share. Like any business, this line too has cut-throat competition. Triple Shree is attempting a entry into the market with his Triple Shree nomenclature - thats his USP perhaps. (Whats UPS , sorry USP ? Maybe the MBA's know).

I was in a hurry write this post, lest I forget the lengthy name of this character. Im not fully aware of the "Pa. Pu." salution abbreviations in the name. This translation is direct from the devnagri scripted poster, so perhaps people in the know about these things can help clarify what it might be standing for.

I had a friend who was interested in godmen and was doing a series on them. Perhaps clicking some links on this page should get you to his blog. You might want to read his take on them too.

(I'm told Pa. Pu. stands for Param Pujya , meaning adorable or respectable)

Electrical Safety - only for a Week ?

In order to create awareness about observance of Electricity Rules and Regulations, the Industries, Energy and Labour Department of Maharashtra State os observing the Electrical Safety Week from 1 Dec to 7 Dec 2005 as per directives from the Central Electricity Board, New Delhi.

The leaflet distributed on this occasion mentions that on an average 1500 fatal accidents occur in Maharashtra State due to electrical shock. It makes no mention of the time span in which these 1500 took place - was it one month, one year, one day .... nobody knows, except probably the smart MBA/IAS officer who drafted the leaflet. And perhaps he or she decided to keep that piece of information to himself. Must be a brand new MBA.

Ive seen many agencies having these "safety weeks". The BEST too has some kind of safety week where perhaps the drivers are urged to drive safely, if only for a week. I thought safety was supposed to be continiuous - at all times - not only during some designated week decided by some IAS officer in Delhi. I know all this is for information and spreading the knowledge about safety, but then shouldnt this disbursement of safety knowledge take place all through the year ? Why should our populace have to wait for this one single wonderful week to be made aware of safety methods etc. ? And the BEST drivers, shouldnt they be driving safely ALWAYS ?

Good Evening and LHB problems

The journey from BCT to NDLS had just started on the 2951 at 1655. Soon the waiter came up to us in our LWACCW (thats the code for the new 2AC LHB coaches). He greeted each passenger with a warm "Good Evening" and gave us the days newspaper. It was good that they gave each one a different one, so that we could share more papers, rather than having the same copy all over the place. I got a copy of "The Hindu". He then proceeded to take our preferences for veg or non-veg dinner and the next days breakfast. I was sure surprised that such courtesy is shown on the Indian Railways. This beahviour is probably reserved for only the Rajdhanis and Shatabdis (they charge more too, and probably the greetings are therefore not free too). I also observed that they were all wearing IRCTC uniforms. On other trains the in-coach service is all out-sourced and those waiters and attendants dont give a damn.

Now about the LHB coaches. LHB stands for Linke Hoffman Busch (LHB, now part of Alstom). Some German company perhaps. A few observations about them:

• The electrical machinery in the coaches takes so much of space that theyve reduced the number of toilets from 4 to 3 in each coach.
• The space between two LHB coaches is about 15 inches, as compared to over three feet thats there between other regular passenger coaches.
• The LHB coaches have no buffers but have a large number of pipes connected between two coaches. (more than 10 perhaps).
• The LHB coaches sure seem to shake more. We would have these two strong jerks everytime the train notched up speed. But this could also be due to a faulty WAP5. For I observed these "jerks" only on the way back between NDLS and BRC (the stretch thats taken care by a WAP5).
• Theyve got electrical charging points near the upper berths for people to charge their mobile phones.
• The toilets are something new - they have this aircraft kind of doors and the urinating area also leads to some kind of storage chamber. Which invariably gets clogged. On my journey, at least once I saw the toilet overflowing with urine. This cant happen in the older style of toilets where the urine and other things fall down on the tracks. It could never "flood" up. Talk of modernisation - perhaps this is the Laloo way of being modern - have overflowing toilets on the Rajdhani.
• For drawing water in the toilets, you have to press a illuminated green button. Then wait. Soon a trickle of water commences and you need to do your thing in that duration. Probably a controlled quota of water for each request to the "Water Server". It sometimes looks as though you might get a electrical shock or something, since the water is coming out of a geyser kind of contraption. I wonder what happens when all of this electrical gadgetry fails. There wouldnt be an alternate way to draw water. Perhaps theyd fill up drums in the passageway of the coaches and keep a sign up there which says "Sorry for the inconvenience".
• The windows and look and livery of the coahes is sure to be admired. Also the space between the two linings of glass on the windows is quite less, compared to an inch in older AC coach windows.

These LHB's have been made at Kapurthala (in Punjab) and not in Germany. It looks as if the LHB's have some basic design flaws and probably have not been adapted for Indian conditions. Or else our boys havent understood the "modern" design and hence have goofed up during maintenance and/or manufacture of the same designs at Kapurthala. In the recent past, too there have been several reports of problems on the LHB rakes - coaches getting decoupled, small fires below the coaches etc. These are serious issues and can lead to safety problems in the future, if not tackeled at this stage.

And in the 2951/2 the attendants wouldnt let you open the doors while the train is in motion. Else theyd pile up the beddings and trash near the doors (there doesnt seem to be space allocated for beddings and trash elsewhere in the coach) , so you cant open them easily.

Delhi Metro - Mera Metro (Mumbai ka Paisa se)

Alt. Title : Delhi MRTS : Delhi Metro

Delhi has been given this swanky new metro rail service. It is still under construction and in the end (maybe in 2010) it would cover most areas of Delhi. Right now there is this underground service (Central Secretariat - Kashmere Gate - Delhi Vishvavidyala ) and an elevated stretch ( Rithala - Kashmere Gate - Shahadara). The elevated route is probably called the "Red Line" and the underground one is maybe called the "Yellow Line" or "Blue Line". This naming probably comes from the notorious Red Line and Blue Line buses that they have in Delhi. Hpwever, the pic alongside is at "Welcome" station (imagine the announcer saying "Welcome to Welcome" - this happens only in Delhi) which is just before Shahadara. Most Delhiites have probably not used this service, probably becasue they associate travelling by a local train as something undignified. Or probably they own cars or scooters. The vehicular population of Delhi is perhaps more than the human population.

A look at the "Economic Implications" in the pic above is rather hilarious. I dont know how these newly minted MBA's manage to come up with these figures of accidents and injuries prevented. They also say that the number of buses would go down, but I'm told that the success of the metro would only be possible when they start feeder bus routes from the metro stations to inner areas of the city. This would obviously mean more buses and not less. You can expect an MBA to come up with such absurdities.

Now most of the stations are extremely clean and well maintained (hardly anyone uses it). Lots of sign boards and directions all over the place and helpful staff all around. You have to buy a "token" (i.e. a ticket) (at a max fare of Rs. 11 it is indeed dirt cheap) and proceed towards the gates. You swipe the token and the barrier opens and you walk through. You then enter the platform areas. A smiliar swipe at the destination allows you to leave the platform. All this fancy things are fine if a few people travel- I dont know what would happen if 500 people/min. turn up. I had been told by a co-passenger on the 2951 that you should quickly get past the barriers since they close pretty fast. He also added that it does help if you are on the slimmer side, else you might get squished between the barriers. And a second swipe wont work, for the contraption would have recorded your passageway and the second swipe would be taken as a "misuse - of trying to travel twice". Nobody would believe that you had luggage and that it took a few seconds more to pass through the barrier, or that you were overweight and hence took longer than the programmed time. Anyway if you do get into this situation you have to call and plead with the supervisor - who after a lot of verifcation etc. would allow you to proceed on your way. (Perhaps keeping some 500's would be helpful here as is the case in any Govt. controlled area in India - especially Delhi) .

The services are punctual. This ought to be the case since the elevated and underground sections dont allow any scope for tresspassing and level crossings etc. which generally casue delays. The trains are also good - fully AC with doors opening and closing at stations. Also the trains have these LED indicator boards / Announcements that tell you which station is coming up and on which side. Infact you can see the entire stretch of the rake once you are inside the train. (People say that its just like the trains aborad - but the main intention of making such statements is to let you know that theyve been abroad and not you).

Delhiites also say that there was minimal obstructions to road traffic while the metro was being constructed. They say that many were unaware that such a large project was being built underneath. Infact theyve gone pretty deep inside and built the metro even below the foundations of most of old Delhi areas. Perhaps our MMRDA can learn some lessons on how to go about infrastructure construction activity without inconveniencing people. Im told the metro is being constructed by some Japanese company.

All this is very good. Perhaps it makes Delhi a showcase city of India. (They've got to get in shape before the Commonwealth Games - thats another reason). But lets get to the finances part and pose this question.

Q. Where did all this obscene amount of money come from ?
A. From the tax paid by Bombayites or Mumbaikars, who rough it out - day in and day out - in the super dense crush loads of the Karjat Fast, Dombivili Slow, Virar Fast, Churchgate Slow and CST Fast.

Short cut to the other side

The location shown alongside is somewhere near the Delhi-UP border. This is on the UP side and the area is rather seedy looking and not much of development has taken place. The road coming from the left of the picture terminates somewhere near the tracks. This is the track stretch between Anand Vihar (near NDLS) and Ghaziabad ( you are looking towards Ghaziabad). Towards the right of the picture is the Sahibabad Industrial Estate. This road is frequented by many people all through the day and you find numerous people crossing over all the time. Amongst those who take this quick route are cyclists, cycle rickshaw walas and also scooterists. It might also be added that the train traffic on this main line is pretty heavy too. And the trains travel at a pretty high speed on this stretch. This way of crossing the tracks is rather dangerous especially if you are lugging your rickshaw or scoooter across. The over bridge is at quite some distance so nobody has any incentive to go upto there to just cross over. Maybe this place is in need of an underpass - this is quite feasable since the tracks are at quite a height above the level of the road. It would save the botherations and dangers of a level-crossing. We have anyway a large number of deaths at both manned and unmanned level crossings. And this current way of crossing is certainly many more times dangerous.